Chapter 28
EVERLY
Hardy:I know you told me to leave you alone, but I wanted to send you a text to let you know I’m giving you space at the wedding. Don’t worry about having to dodge me. I want you to be comfortable and have fun, so I’ll keep my distance. Thank you for being there for Ken and Polly. I appreciate it.
I stare down at Hardy’s text as I sit in my car in front of the hotel where I’m meeting Polly, tears filling my eyes.
I turn my phone over and lean my head back against the headrest, taking deep breaths to calm myself.
You’re a professional, Everly.
You can do this.
You can get through this wedding without crying.
Without thinking about him.
Unfortunately, that’s what I tried to convince myself of yesterday when I was supposed to go to the rehearsal dinner, but since I couldn’t get it together, I cancelled on Polly, letting her know I had another event.
Well, that other event was actually a sobfest put on by yours truly. I spent the entire night in my apartment, crying into my pillow while I inhaled the lingering scent he left behind from our one night together.
So freaking pathetic.
But that can’t be me today.
I have a job to do…and though it may be a phony job, I am still a professional and will see through my commitments.
I will get through this wedding, take pictures, smile at the reception, and after dinner is served, I will slip out, knowing my duties are done.
Simple as that.
I can do this.
I was made to get through tough things, this being one of them.
Taking a deep breath, I fold down my car visor, open up the mirror, and wipe at my face, attempting to brush away my sadness and put on a bright smile for the bride.
When the lump in my throat has dissipated and the redness in my cheeks has calmed down, I gather the bag that’s next to me as well as my dress, and I exit my car, ready to take on this challenge.
If anything, I’ve always enjoyed a good challenge, and this is no exception.
I’m going to walk into the bridal suite, show just how ready I am for this wedding, and be the best bridesmaid ever to be hired.
Shoulders held back, I walk into the opulent conservatory and make my way toward the beautiful old garden, one of my all-time favorite venues here. Once a botanical garden open to the public, a new owner took over and has turned the glass conservatory into a wedding venue, hiring a twenty-four-hour garden staff to maintain the stunning plants, and turning the inside of the conservatory into a paradise for parties. It’s on the smaller size, so there is just enough room for a group of one hundred and fifty, along with a dance floor. But when the San Francisco weather cooperates, the conservatory’s attached courtyard offers more space and is surrounded by native foliage, botanicals of vibrant colors, and water features that set a beautiful, serene ambiance for any event, especially a wedding.
Today, we will be having the ceremony in the courtyard and hopefully getting inside just before the rain is supposed to start. There’s a small window, so we can make it.
And because the owner was thinking about the conservatory with weddings in mind, they turned two of the garden sheds into bridal and groom suites, each on opposite ends of the venue.
I’m headed toward the bridal suite.
My feet crunch against the gravel of the path that leads to the back of that suite, not needing to stop and talk to anyone because the whole staff already knows me here. I glance over at the courtyard where white chairs are lined up, the archway opening up on a shrub maze covered in beautiful pink, purple, and white flowers. Just stunning.
Polly and Ken’s moms did a beautiful job picking everything out. From the votives lining the aisle, to the choice in flowers and venue, this will be a wedding they will never forget.
As I near the bridal suite, I remind myself that I am smiling, keeping it together, and being the consummate professional.
I can do this.
I plaster on a smile, knock on the door, and when I hear Polly call out, “Come in,” I open it and step inside to find Polly in a chair getting her hair styled, and Maple sitting across from her, getting her makeup done.
And for some stupid reason, seeing their welcoming faces, it…it does something to me.
It reminds me of the night of the party, the night Hardy and I got together, and before I can stop myself, my emotions get the better of me.
My lip quivers.
My eyes well up with tears.
And my stomach heaves in embarrassment as I let out a feral sob.
“Oh my God,” Polly says as she gets up from the chair and comes up to me, pulling me into a hug. Holding me tightly, she turns toward the makeup and hair artists. “Can you give us a moment?”
“That’s not necessary,” I say, snot forming in my nose.
“It is,” Polly says and then brings me over to the couch that’s a focal point in the room, a place where mothers of the bride usually sit and watch their daughters get ready.
I hear the makeup and hair artists leave the room just as Polly and I sit on the couch, Maple coming to sit right next to me as well.
“I’m sorry,” I say as Polly hands me a tissue. “This wasn’t supposed to happen. I came here with every intention of being professional and not bringing my personal issues into this wedding…but the moment I saw you two, I was just…reminded. I’m sorry.” I dab at my eyes. “Just give me a second.”
“You don’t need to apologize,” Polly says. “I’m the one who pulled you into this mess. If you need to cry, then you cry.”
“No, it’s your wedding day.” I take a deep breath and swipe at my eyes with the tissue. “I’m not going to sit here and cry. We are going to celebrate.”
Maple places her hand on my leg. “Everly, we are not going to bypass the fact that you’re upset. You’ve helped us so much these last two months, and now it’s time for us to help you.”
“Seriously, it’s not—”
“He’s fallen for you,” Polly shouts over me.
“Huh?” I ask.
Maple stands and walks over to Polly’s side where she takes a seat on the arm of the couch, so I can look at them both at the same time. With a serious tone and a sincere expression, Maple repeats, “He’s fallen for you.”
“What…what are you talking about?” I ask, even though I know exactly what they’re talking about.
“Hardy,” Polly says. “He has fallen for you. He told us last night at the rehearsal. He’s miserable, pathetic, and beyond regretful for how he treated you. He was a real downer last night and told me he promised to be better today, but I know the minute he sees you, he’s just going to return to the depressed state he was in last night.”
“Depressed state?” I ask.
Polly slowly nods. “Yes, Everly. When I say I’ve never seen him like this, I’m not lying. He’s so far gone where you’re concerned and truly believes that he’s lost any chance at being with you.”
“Has he?” Maple asks.
I look between the both of them, their hopeful faces making me feel sick to my stomach. “Uh…I just…I can’t.” My eyes well up again and I hate myself for it. Come on, Everly, get it under control.
“You can’t what?” Polly asks. “Talk about it or be with him?”
“Both,” I say while Maple hands me another tissue.
Silence falls between us as Polly gently rubs my back.
After a few seconds, she says, “Well, that’s…that’s unacceptable.”
“What?” I ask, wiping away another tear.
Polly shakes her head. “This is not what I signed up for. This…this pursuit, it can’t end like this.”
“What do you mean it can’t end like this?” I ask.
“She means, you’re supposed to be with him. Simple as that,” Maple puts in. “All of this happened for a reason—you trying to help him to get close with me again, when in reality you two were forming a deep bond. This wedding brought you two together. I saw it with my own eyes the night of the double date. You have a connection that is unlike anything I’ve seen before, and he knows it. He feels it. He wants it. It just can’t end like this. You and Hardy belong together.”
“You do,” Polly adds. “And I know he hurt you. We are not forgetting that part because your feelings are valid, but…he apologized, right?”
I slowly nod. “He did.”
“And even with that apology, you can’t forgive him?”
I twist my hands in my lap. “I’m just…I’m scared,” I admit and then look up at both Polly and Maple. “You don’t know this, but I’ve liked Hardy for a while now.” I clear my throat. “Uh, was crushing on him hard when he asked me to help him get back together with you, Maple.”
“Wait…really?” she asks with a concerned expression. “You were helping him get close with me when you were crushing on him?”
I nod again, more tears flowing down my cheeks. “When he initially asked me to help, I thought he was asking me out. It was sort of a blow. Either way, I said yes, and the more time I spent with him, the more I hoped and wished that he was going to maybe see me for who I was, not just the girl helping him get back together with his ex. And then when he finally did see me, it was…” I dab at my eyes with the tissue. “It was everything I hoped for, an actual dream becoming reality, only for the reality to come to a crashing halt. I was so hurt, so damaged that it scared me. It still scares me because I like him so much. I can’t stop thinking about him, but I don’t want to feel that pain…this current pain. I hate it.”
Polly takes my hand in hers and rubs her thumb over my knuckles. “I’m so sorry, Everly. We had no idea.”
“That makes me so…sad. I wish I’d known,” Maple murmurs.
“It’s fine,” I say as I continue to wipe away my tears. “No one really knew besides my sister. It was why I was trying to date other guys, because I was trying to forget about him. But it was impossible. So, after everything that happened that morning when he told me he couldn’t be with me…three different ways, it was like a dagger to my soul, crushing and heartbreaking. This man that I’ve wanted for so long, trying everything in his power to let me down gently. It just…it—”
“It wasn’t his truth,” Maple says. When I look up at her, she gives me a kind smile. “That wasn’t his truth. Was he a dumbass in that moment? Yes, but it wasn’t how he felt. He wanted nothing more than to be with you. But his brother got in his head, and given the situation with his father and not wanting to damage the family any more, Hardy would have done anything to keep his siblings close, even if that meant giving up what he wants.”
“She’s right,” Polly adds. “Hardy is very loyal, and if Hudson put up a fight, then he would have stepped back to make sure he didn’t hurt his siblings.”
“He’s never fought like this before,” Maple says. “I know because he didn’t fight for us, and I’m okay with that—we weren’t supposed to be together. I like to think that my relationship with Hardy was a pathway for you two to find each other. I know you’re scared, and I know he hurt you, but it wasn’t intentional. Hardy would never do that. He’s a good guy, a solid guy, the kind of guy that you want in your life. He’ll be good to you, Everly. He’ll be a partner—someone you can rely on. Please don’t block him out of your life because he was an idiot the morning after, or an idiot in handling this whole situation.”
“And he owns up to being the idiot. Last night he told us all about it and how he wishes he could take it all back, have a do-over.” Polly looks me dead in the eyes. “I think he’s in love with you, Everly, and if you don’t let him back in, if you don’t allow him to have another chance, then you’re going to be missing out on a great man.”
My lip quivers.
More tears build behind my eyes.
And I lean back against the couch, letting out a deep breath as I stare up at the ceiling.
“I think I’m in love with him too,” I say, surrendering to these feelings that won’t stop racing through me no matter how hard I try to block them out. “And I don’t think I can stop it from happening.”
“You’re not supposed to stop love, Everly, you’re supposed to embrace it.” Polly tugs on my hand, forcing me to look at her. “It will be okay, I promise. He won’t hurt you again, and if he does, I’ll be first in line to hurt him.”
Maple holds up her hand. “Second.”
I chuckle and cover my face with my hands. “Ugh, this is not why I’m here. This day is about you.”
“In that case,” Polly says, “I demand that you make things right with Hardy.”
“Polly—”
“I’m serious. It’s the least you can do for putting me ten minutes behind on hair and makeup.” She smiles softly. “Seriously, I have an idea, a way to seal the deal on this romance you two have been working through.”
“I love ideas,” Maple says. “Especially when they’re demanded by the bride, because you have no other choice. If she demands it, you have to do it.”
“Precisely,” Polly says. “So…are you ready to make things right with Hardy?”
I look between the two of them and despite the nerves bouncing through me, I say, “I hope I can trust you two.”
A large smile spreads across both of their faces. “Oh, you can trust us,” Polly says. “We were the ones who made the night of your dreams happen…it’s only poetic this comes full circle now.”
HARDY
Smile.
Breathe.
Smile…
Breathe.
Two words and two words only have been on repeat in my head since the moment we started taking pre-ceremony pictures.
I’ve been chill all morning, hanging out with Ken and a very excited George who bought us all matching socks because he was so thrilled to be a groomsman. I’ve kept my mind on my friend and not the impending photo session and ceremony, where I knew I’d have to see Everly. I did a good job, but fuck, the moment I saw her in that dress, I felt my heart crash to the ground.
The dress is hugging her in all the right places but not showing off too much. When she walks, the slit shows off a glimmer of her leg, reminding me of how they felt wrapped around my waist. And her hair, sleek and curled on the ends, hangs like a black velvet curtain over her shoulders, tucked behind her ears so her heart-shaped face is on display. And those lips, painted in a simple rose color, shine against the light of the day, tugging on my heart, reminding me of how much I lost.
She is stunning.
So goddamn beautiful that I’ve had a really hard time keeping my eyes off her.
And I think I’ve held it together for the most part. I’ve kept my distance like I promised. I’ve stolen glances when she hasn’t been looking—well, she’s only caught me staring twice. But now, as I stand next to Ken, him reciting his vows to Polly, the clouds rolling in, ready to downpour any second, I can feel this ache so deep in my soul that I’m not sure how I’m going to make it through the reception.
“It is with the greatest pleasure…” the reverend says, but I tune him out as I glance over at Everly for the hundredth time since the ceremony started.
I catch the tears in her eyes, the joy in her expression.
Even with everything I put her through, she still can look past that and see the love between two people, really feel and celebrate it.
It makes me want her that much more.
The crowd cheers, knocking me out of my thoughts and reminding me that I need to participate, so I clap as well while Ken and Polly start heading down the aisle.
Thankfully I’m paired up with Maple, so we meet in the middle of the aisle, she loops her arm through mine, and we follow behind Ken and Polly all the way into the conservatory. When we stop in the middle of the dance floor, I grow confused, because from what the wedding planner said yesterday, we were supposed to branch off and take more pictures. Did plans change?
“Are we supposed to be doing something?” I ask, my back toward Everly. “I thought the wedding planner said we were taking family and bridal party photos?”
“No, we took enough,” Polly says. “We actually want to get into first dances.”
“Oh,” I say with a nod as the guests start to filter in as well. Isn’t there supposed to be a happy hour or something? This seems so…odd.
“Let’s get out of the way,” Maple says, tugging me to the edge of the dance floor as Ken wraps his arm around Polly. And then as if everyone was instructed, no one takes a seat. Instead, all the guests circle the dance floor, and the lights dim, thunder strikes in the distance, and “Thinking Out Loud” by Ed Sheeran starts playing through the speakers surrounding us.
I couldn’t have picked a better song for my friends.
Keeping my eyes on them, I catch the glimmer in Polly’s eyes as she stares up at her now husband. I see Ken’s tight grip as he holds her close. And as they slowly move over the dance floor, the group surrounding them is captured by the love they have for each other. It’s undeniable, and all I can think about is how much I wish I had that with Everly.
How I wish I never fucked things up with her.
How I wish that instead of us keeping our distance, her arm was looped through mine.
This evening would be so much better with her by my side, her hand in mine, safe in the knowledge that I wouldn’t be going home alone tonight, but instead, I’d be going home with my girl.
“You’re tensing up,” Maple says next to me.
“Am I?” I ask, not noticing.
“Yes, you’re squeezing my arm.”
“Oh, sorry,” I whisper back.
“Everything okay?”
“Yup,” I say, even though I’m the furthest thing from okay. “They look great, don’t they?”Belongs to (N)ôvel/Drama.Org.
Maple glances over at Polly and Ken and then back at me. “They are amazing. I’m…I’m proud of them for finding their way back to each other. When they broke up, I almost couldn’t believe it. I knew they were meant for each other, so being here, at their wedding and witnessing a start of a new chapter, it brings me a lot of joy.”
I smile at that. “Me too. They’re going to have a beautiful marriage.”
“To everyone out there, friends and family, the couple would like you to join them on the dance floor if you’re willing,” the DJ says into the microphone.
Of course, the older couples are first out on the dance floor, Ken and Polly’s parents not being shy in the slightest.
I turn toward Maple. “Do you want to dance?”
“No,” she answers flatly.
Okay. Wasn’t expecting that answer or an answer so abrupt.
“Not a problem,” I awkwardly say just as there is a tap on my arm. I look to the right and feel my entire body seize as my gaze locks in on Everly’s green eyes.
A lump immediately grows in my throat, and I can feel all the air escape my lungs because this is how much she affects me.
“May I have this dance?” she asks, holding her hand out.
Uh…is she serious?
She knows she’s asking me, right?
When I don’t answer right away, Maple nudges me. “Of course, he would love to dance with you.” And then she pushes me toward the dance floor.
Confused and nervous all at the same time, I turn toward Everly, unsure of how to handle this. “I, uh, I was giving you space,” I say awkwardly.
“I know,” she replies as she takes my hand in hers and wraps my arm around her waist. “But I’m not looking for space right now.”
What?
Before I can ask her what she means, she leads us in a gentle sway, her hand landing on my shoulder, near my neck.
So many thoughts, so many questions are running rapidly through my head, but for once, I don’t open my mouth because I don’t want to scare her away. I don’t want her to regret this decision to dance with me. Because I might not be able to have her, but I can at least have this small moment with her.
After a few seconds of swaying back and forth with her, I can feel her eyes land on me, peering up, looking for a return in her stare. On a deep breath, I look down, and when she smiles up at me, I become weak in the goddamn knees.
“Everly,” I say, my throat choking up, but I don’t get to finish my sentence because the music stops, and everyone starts clapping.
“The bar is open, and appetizers will be passed around. The bride and groom want you to mingle and enjoy,” the DJ says.
Sad the music is over, I let go of Everly and take a step away from her. “Uh…thanks for the dance.” I stick my hands in my pockets out of pure survival, because if I don’t, I can see myself grabbing her, pulling her into my chest and running my hands through her luscious hair.
“Hardy?” she says, taking a step forward, closing the space I put between us.
“Yes?” I gulp.
Her eyes search mine, and when she grabs my hand, lacing our fingers together, I try not to close my eyes from the feel of it, the connection I so desperately want. “Can we talk?”
I nod. Please, fuck, let this be a good talk.
She weaves us through the crowd and toward the front of the conservatory where the lobby opens up to public restrooms and a miniature fountain feature, which helps drown out the echo the tall ceilings and glass walls provide.
She tugs me over to the side, to a bench that is tucked in the corner, near an old gift shop that is now used as a coat check.
When we sit down, she turns toward me and takes both of my hands in hers.
Please let this be good.
Please, fuck, let it be good.
Her thumbs rub over my knuckles, and when those green eyes stare up at me, I can see my future. She’s in it. We’re wearing matching shirts, holding hands, and sharing a large chocolate cake that we have no intention of finishing, but are talking a big game about how we’re about to own the sugary confection. I see lazy mornings in my bed, late nights in her apartment sharing a meal, long conversations about nothing and everything. I can feel the love she gives me every day, the affection she bestows upon me, and the comfort in knowing that I have a partner in this life.
“Hardy,” she says, her voice sounding nervous.
“Yes?” I ask.
She wets her lips and says, “I was wondering if maybe, uh…you would like to go out on a date with me.”
All the air escapes my lungs as I tug her even closer. “Are you serious right now? Please don’t be joking—I don’t think my heart can take it.”
She smiles softly. “I’m not joking. I wouldn’t do that.”
“I mean, yeah, Everly. Of course. I…fuck, I want nothing more than to take you out, to…to have so much more with you. I…” I feel my words catch in my throat, my thoughts jumbling in my head out of pure excitement. “I didn’t think you were interested. I was…I was giving you space.”
“I know,” she says quietly. “But I don’t want space, Hardy.” When her eyes meet mine again, I watch, hope welling in me, as they tear up. “I’m falling for you and there’s nothing I can do about it. There’s no amount of space that can stop it from happening. It just…is.”
“Fuck,” I say as I bring her hands up to my mouth. I press a kiss to her knuckles. “Everly, I…what…why did you change your mind? I hurt you, and I don’t deserve this—I don’t deserve you.”
“You do,” she says with a tilt of her head. She runs her hand over my beard. “And I deserve you. I just needed some people to put that into perspective for me.”
“Some people?” I ask with a raise of my brow. “Would those people be Polly and Maple?”
She nods. “Yes, they told me what you said to them last night and, well, they swore you would never hurt me again.”
“Never,” I say far too quickly. “Fuck, never, Everly. I’m…I’m so sorry about everything. About that morning, about not telling you about Haisley, about how I handled every aspect of this. I’ve been out of my goddamn mind, unable to figure out how to handle these feelings because…” I look her in the eyes, holding her captive. “Because I’m falling for you too, and I’ve never felt this way before. Not that it’s an excuse, but I handled these feelings terribly. I hurt you, and I swear I will never fucking do it again. I want you, Everly. I want everything about you. I want your charm, your sass, your notes in your notebook. I want to be able to touch you, kiss you, hold you without some sort of ulterior motive. I want your mind, your jokes, your shameless attitude about wearing matching shirts.” She smirks. “And I want your heart, to hold in my hands, where I can protect it and never let anything bad ever happen.” I tug her toward me, and she slides onto my lap as I cup her cheek. “I want this, us, and I will do everything in my power, if you will let me, to prove to you that I’m the man you deserve.”
Her hand presses to my chest. “I already know you are, Hardy. I’ve known for a long time and there’s no changing that in my mind, no matter how hard I try.”
“Well, please don’t try anymore,” I say. “Please be mine.”
She grins and presses her forehead against mine. “I’m yours.”
“Fuck,” I whisper and nuzzle my nose against hers. “I’m so sorry, Everly. So fucking sorry.”
“I know,” she whispers back and then brings her lips right above mine, a whisper away. “I know.”
And then her mouth meets mine. Immediately, I shift my hand behind her head, holding her in place as I part her lips with my tongue and find that deep connection I so desperately desire with her.
She matches my strokes, her hands closing around the lapels of my jacket, her sweet moans bringing me back to that night…the night where I felt my entire life change.
The night I realized that I hadn’t truly experienced life in its full technicolor until her lips met mine.
And now that I get to have her in my arms again, I get to hold her and claim her, that feeling is in full effect—I can hear louder, see clearer, smell every last flower in this conservatory. Life is brighter, bolder with her in my arms, and I’ll be damned if I ever let her go again.
It’s me and her…my best friend, my girl.
“Woooooo!” Clapping and cheering sounds off in front of us, and I pull away just enough to catch Maple, Polly, and Ken standing a few feet away, huge smiles on their faces.
Everly looks over her shoulder and when she sees them, she curls in closer to me.
“You two are perfect,” Maple says, clasping her hands in front of her.
“You better not hurt her,” Polly calls out.
“I won’t,” I say. “Never again.” I kiss Everly’s bare shoulder and when she looks back at me, I know for certain, there isn’t a chance in hell I will ever hurt her again.
She’s it for me, and I will spend every last second of my life, proving that to her.
From an acquaintance, to a bridesmaid undercover, to a best friend, to my girl, that’s how it will stay.