FORTY-TWO
I smiled while making the bed. I changed all the things in the room and arranged them well. I also put perfume and also put petals on the bed. I also bought a bouquet of flowers for her. I also put a scented candle on the floor.
Oh damn! Call me crazy but as a man, I plan something bad later on for my wife. Why not? She’s my fucking wife and it’s true because we will never be separated. Although I know I have a deficiency, maybe we can talk about it when the day comes.
I even prepare the food. I don’t know how to cook, but I think what I made looks delicious. Also, it is me who cooked it, so for sure my wife will love it.Exclusive content © by Nô(v)el/Dr/ama.Org.
I am so fucking excited to meet her. I still remember her appearance. Just thinking about what we will do when I see her, I can’t explain my feelings. I feel thrilled, butterflies tickle my stomach.
Is the taste of her lips still the same? How about her juice? Damn, I miss her so much. I want to go and pick her up because I don’t want to spoil our conversation. She said she was going so I will wait. But I feel every minute is like a year while waiting for her.
Oh, fuck! I miss her so damn much. I really miss her.
My phone rang and I answered immediately when I saw Lauren’s name. My heart rate is so exciting. I feel like I’m a teenager that’s excited to meet her crush.
“W-wife?”
“Did you prepare dinner for me?” she asked a little coldly. But it’s ok, the important thing is that she will go home. I am sure when she comes home we will both be happy again. Her treatment will be the same as before.
“Yeah.”
“How about the room?”
“Yeah.” Why do I feel like I want something to happen to her? Just thinking about it makes me excited. I know that even though she was cold, she also missed me.
“I’ll be late. I’m with Hendrick.” Oh damn, that asshole. Is that animal still alive? I don’t know if I will be hurt or what. She said she loves me and they are still together. What if I kill that bastard? Kidding. But that ass is still a problem.
“Ok,” I said sadly. It’s just my heart and I’m sad all of a sudden.
“We’ll just talk, I’ll break up with him properly.”
“Really?” I feel like a child who was bought a lot of toys from what I heard. My heart was trembling with so much joy. I am so damn excited to hear it.
“Yes, I want to focus on you. You, alone.” Shittt, it’s exciting. I feel like ten hands are tickling me with so much excitement. Even though she’s cold, her tenderness is still there. Her voice seemed to bite my ears, to my heart.
“Take care.”
“I am. I will come home to you.” Oh, come on yourself! Stop smiling and you look like a fool.
“All right.” And she dropped the call.
I look like an idiot smiling while looking at my cellphone. A little more time and my wife will be home. I am so damn excited and I don’t know what to do.
I went to the kitchen and set the table. I got out some new stuff and while setting up I was watching youtube. I also put a candle to be romantic. I also chilled the champagne.
I want it to be perfect. I want this to be special. Our dinner should be special. Because tonight, I will admit to her my real feelings. I will tell her face to face that I love her. We will start tonight and nothing can stop us.
When I made sure everything was fine here, I left the kitchen. I’ll just wait for her in the living room. I will make sure that I can hear the car engine when she arrives.
While sitting on the sofa, I couldn’t help but smile. I know that I love her, I don’t know when it started but I am sure that I already fell for her a long time ago. Maybe Dylan was right, I was in denial at that time. But deep inside I know I have feelings for her.
Her scent makes me calm, I always miss her, I want to see her, and I want to be on her side always. And even if I don’t admit it, I know I’m jealous of Hendrick.
The past is really holding me back so I’m afraid to admit it. Although my fear is still there that she might not like me when she finds out about me and Lindsay, I’m sure she will understand me.
Just like how she understood me before for what I did because of my past with Carmona.
I am so damn lucky to have her. I am so lucky to be loved as much as she is. I was just a fool to push her away but now that we are back together. I will make sure that the two of us will never be separated. And no one can separate us.
We will make this marriage a reality and we will never be separated. I will make her happy. Even though my fear of giving her a child is still here, I know it can be done in a way. She will always understand me.
I look at the clock again. It’s only been five minutes but it feels like I’ve been waiting for five years. Is true love really like this? Are you restless and overcome anxiety while waiting?
I may be an ass when I push her but I can still deny the fact that I’m hurt when I did it. Just thinking about losing her makes me lose my sanity. I don’t know, I can’t explain my fucking feelings. All I know is that I love her.
This is not the first time that I feel in love. Lindsay was my first, but not like this. I admit that I committed a sin with her because of the intensity of my love but with Lauren—-I can’t do that to her. I’m afraid of hurting her because of me. I’m afraid I can’t make her happy.
My love for them is different. I became selfish to Lindsay as long as she is mine and I don’t care about her, but to Lauren, I can be selfless. I can sacrifice everything for her. If I almost let her go, maybe it was because I was afraid that I might not be able to make her happy.
Because I’m still afraid to have children.
Child—–I also want to have my own. But I don’t want to put Lauren at risk. Right now I’m not ready and I don’t know when I will be. But as long as Lauren is with me I know we can be happy.
My phone rang and I saw an unfamiliar number registered. I frowned because I didn’t know whose it was but I answered anyway.
“Yes?”
“Dwayne Dale?”
“Yeah, who is it?”
“It’s Hendrick.” My heart suddenly throbs. I stood up when I heard who was on the other side.
“What do you want? Where’s Lauren?” I don’t know what happened but my hunch is not good. Lauren told me that she will come with Hendrick, and now this asshole will call me. “Where’s Lauren?”
“We are here at Happy Smile Hospital.”
“What? What happened to her?” I asked nervously then entered the room and took the key.
“I didn’t mean to, it was just as sudden as—–”
“Where’s my fucking wife?!”
“Dwayne Dale.”
“What happened to him and where is she?”
“S-she’s—–s-shes gone, Lauren is gone.”
“What?” I stopped walking because of what she said.”I’m sorry, I don’t—–”
“WHAT DID YOU SAY?!”
“She’s dead, Dwayne Dale. Lauren is gone.”